Did you drop out of school? Have your path towards the intended goal for the education you started failing? It can be a pretty shitty feeling when you’re giving in and just don’t feel like it anymore. So how to drop out of school -and what to tell your family about it? I got some suggestions for that, and some opinions about school.
I have seen it again and again both with friends, clients, and past Taekwon-Do students. They struggle coping with school and to keep up the motivation and balancing the demands for results. It’s not something that surprises me anymore. In case you haven’t noticed, it’s common. And it’s fine. And let me tell you something;
You don’t suck!
The system does. And your motivations does, because of the system. And over time you lose energy in both mind and body. And there is a reason for that.
So, how to drop out of school in the first place?
Okay, so if you ask me? I would probably tell you this: Just do it! There’s no particular formula, is it? What you need to do is to be true to yourself about the reason for why you want to break out, and then make the decision.
I bet you think about what your family and friends would say. It’s a sensitive topic like education is a religion not to be made fun of. You have to spend some mind time and come to the conclusion that you are worth more to yourself than others opinions and dreams of what they thing you should do.
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Make the decisions. If you need support, you will find like-minded who will support you. And this will be a good time to have a mentor supporting, guiding, and telling you what to do next.Consider, decide, and make the decision.
First, two important things to understand about your dropout
The first one is to have a look at the reason for why you dropped the books and left the classroom. And the second one is to understand that school, most learning environments and the educational framework is a well-known disaster on this planet. In general, the methods used are not working well. And too many young people get trashed by educational fire walking. Some of them broken down for years after. I met a few.
In fact, just one week ago I met up with one of my past Taekwon-Do students. I learned that school had crushed him so hard that he dropped out and are now getting counseling. It’s sad because he is a perfectly healthy, smart and nice dude.
If I had my own kids, I wouldn’t put them through this risky extreme sport of playing with their spirit in such a fragile state of early life.
Question: Why did you drop out in the first place?
The following situations can probably relate to your reasons for wanting to quit.
Amount of work and sickening grade hustle
So let’s first have a look at why you ended your student career. Usually, it’s all about motivation. Though, of course, it’s hard to keep up the motivation in such a way that you maintain the capacity to hustle the demands on the amount of work and to reach specific results and nice numbers.
The faculties’ expectations for you to deliver is pretty sick. Both the amount of content you’re expected to swallow makes you want to through up like a force-fed goose. (Poor thing) And the expectations of certain grades and results kills the spirit and capacity for learning, and students probability to even make it.
The learning methods, the amount of work and the results you are expected to bring in is one of the biggest struggles going to school. Is this your reason for not making it? If so, a truly valid reason.
Wrong choice on an educational path
Well, that is also a very valid reason too. With such an unworthy and rigid system you are put though, it’s not making your motivation grow even to try to make it in what you have decided on.
Being 16 – 20 years old, you have little clue about life in general. And who knows themselves at that age? And you are then supposed to stake out your path in life and aim for an educational track that MIGHT be a right choice? Just do discover it was wrong AFTER you have learned more about life and yourself? Neeeeh…
If we lived in a world where learning was more organic, with lovely, beautiful and inspiring learning environments and motivating teachers, you would probably complete at least the first year anyway.
Your life has other struggles right now
That is also a valid reason. Life happens. And maybe life already happened to you, and things are keeping your mind busy and energy down even to consider the school.
The class rooms most of the sheep-herd are automatically led thought is not organized and prepared for taking care of individuals. It’s a un-lubricated machinery for a flock of humans. If shit happened in your life, there just isn’t room for you to be seen, taken care of, motivated, and to adapt your learning to you.
You just don’t feel like it and don’t have the motivation
You know what? That is a fucking perfect and valid reason also. There can be several why’s for you to be a slacker not wanting to go to school. But I will say this;
Having no clue of what you want to do with your life is normal. Maybe you should jump on a couple of school years of some generic stuff just to be activated in your life and keep your mind busy. But are you building dept then? Then don’t do it.
Who will say today that the smartest thing you can do when you’re 17 is beginning life with a no-clue educational path and a big pile of debt in front of your door?
And let’s not forget this fact. The school is not for everybody. Haha, it’s that simple. At least not in this current state of affairs. But school COULD be for everybody. I just think we have to look into the future. Consider Finland as a wonderful example.
So you ended school -what do you tell your family?
If you read my blog post until now, I guess you already found some good answers to bring to the table. Let them have it!
Don’t forget that our parents and especially grand parents have a totally different worldview of how important they think education is for you. Oh my, what will my child become of, if it not proper schooled… (Worrying thoughts).
Borrow my answer: “I will be very-fucking-fine-thank-you, if you let me!…
Or consider one of the following, milder replies. I will sum-up some formulas that you may write down and freely use in your social discussions and responses to family and friends:
- “Sorry, I discovered and found out by educating myself just a little, that the methods used in school are breaking me down more than educating me.”
- “I’m sorry, but fighting my way through education is not how learning is supposed to be. I will consider picking up again when I have the capacity for it.”
- “I have come to a conclusion and enlightened answer to your worries about my future well-being, that I cannot fulfill YOUR dreams about me within a framework I don’t even believe in myself.”
- “Though some people seem to make it through this educational valley of death, I will not tolerate killing my very human spirit on behalf of societies lowers norms and expectations. I’m worth more than that.”
- “Nope, I simply expected better schooling system that what I have been forced to comply with.”
- “It’s not that I’m not capable. It’s the classrooms that are not capable of educating my form of being in a healthy way.”
- “Conforming to and walking nicely in the lines of the educational factory, have taught me one thing: I’m better off educating myself.”
- “Sorry, but school didn’t handle my individual uniqueness well and left me stamped as a trashed rebel, which I’m not.”
- “I’m sorry to see that your love for the system is not compatible with mine. I wish for you to believe in me, and not in the system.”
- “School and education are not for everyone. Especially in my age and at this time. I won’t invest my mind-energy in maybe’s and perhaps’s, but instead, nurture the discovery of myself.”
Most people are not trying to be a ‘nobody’ and ‘useless.’
I bet you have seen or met several fellow students who simply do not perform well in class. Or at school in general. They seem totally lost, uninterested, slack, and maybe even rebellious in their behavior.
That is completely fine. Don’t forget that they have their own story, and you most likely have no clue what their real background and life struggles are or have been. I’m sure that if individuals like that would have been seen, taken care of, included, and motivated. Something would change.
Human beings, in general, have a default set of basic needs and wants. One of them is, in fact, to feel seen, loved, feeling useful, and being part of a society.
The thing is that the one person who maybe acts like a shit-head in school, can, in fact, be the most enlightened fellow human being in class. The problem is that he is not seen, heard, or have the tuning to operate within the demands and norms of a classroom at school.
For most of our societies misfits, outsiders and rebels, I don’t think they really WANT to feel useless, not be seen, to feel part of something important. I bet you would see magic happen IF that person were put into the right environment, with motivating learning and being along with the right fellow students. And to be encouraged within this individuals capacity and framework of life.
Something unique and truly astonishing happens with humans when they are allowed to truly be themselves, and channel their highest potential. The brains chemistry changes, their mood changes and their whole body become vibrant.
You should try that once. Instead of just complying with. Or to deform yourself to fit in, or degrade your natural self to a different standard than what you really are.
How to discover your natural self and your capacity
This is really a whole different topic. But I just wanted to mention a few lines, since we are on the topic of dropping out of school.
You have told your parents, friends, or some worrying family members. So what now?
Use your feelings. Yes! Feelings, your emotions that are felt in your gut, your stomach, and sometimes in your whole body. Use that as your sensory apparatus to better understand what your intuition tells you.
Very simplified. There are within your personal preferences, some things you like and some things you don’t like. What does that tell you? I’m not talking about going to the dentist. Of course, you will feel that in your stomach right before. But you still should do it.
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I have a system and tool that I use when mentoring people into a personal discovery shift. Using this to work with the individual, we discover traits, tendencies, and probably preferences. I have served them a workbook that twists their minds to start thinking about themselves in a new way.
It’s just sad that this is not part of our first years of school.
Did you ever drop out of school? I would love for you to share this as a comment to this post. I would be good for the world to see and hear you speak your truth.